Red eyes looking back at you stumbling

A few months ago I signed up to have another go at the Brisbane half-marathon. As proud as I was of finishing last year, and of going under 2 hours, I was disappointed with how I ran it, and my main motivation for signing up again was to see if I was capable of running it "properly" (whatever that means), and seeing what doing so would mean for my time. It seemed like a good idea when the run was still 3 months away. Now, though, its 3 weeks, and I am forced to admit that I am not in the kind of shape that will allow me to test my hypothesis on what is a more difficult course than last year.

My motivation for signing up is significant in part because it does not stem from any tremendous joy experienced during last year's tilt. To be honest, I get bored beyond about 10km, and one of the dominating emotions I have while running longer distances is that of self-admonition for not being better at it. (This isn't the only time I go in for self-admonition - its one of my goto moves - but it is one of the more intense ones).

The race organisers sent around an image on their facebook page the other day.

I know some people for whom this has some truth. My lunch hours, though, are for eating. My Saturday mornings are absolutely for sleeping, and I'm pretty keen on the idea of taking it easy on my holidays. By any reasonable interpretation of this motivational, then...

I am not a runner. I'd quite like to say otherwise, but its just not the case.

That said, I've paid my entry fees, and since I'm (a) too tightarsed to go asking for a refund, and (b) not a fan of that feeling of walking when I should be running, I figure I'll keep training as much as my body allows for a couple of weeks and hope I can somehow scrape in under 2 hours again.